31) Hate and Liars

It seems like both of us are frozen to the spot, unable to move or think. We stare at each other, unblinking, perhaps each waiting for the other to either speak or act.
She is dead to rights, my gun is aiming squarely at her, and she it stuck, no way she could move quickly enough to beat me to it.

'Why.. what is going on?' I finally ask.

She looks at me, her eyes change, as if she is sad somehow.

'Why did you take off?' I ask, not foolish enough to relax my grip. I admit, I feel sick to my stomach. Before I was just left confused, and angry that I had lost so much, but seeing her, firing at me of all people.

'Hey buddy, I didn't realize it was you.' Judy says. Her accent is different, broader, her words sound almost like slang.

'Judy.' I ask instinctively, wondering if I have made some kind of mistake, and it isn't her.

'Hey stranger..' She says, still with the same odd accent, but at the same time, a sly smile on her face. I  had been naive, but not such a fool that I didn't learn quickly.

'Let me just get up and...' She says, sounding friendly, but she rolls over, swings out an arm, she has a pistol...

Either I am very lucky, or have talents that I remain unaware of. Without blinking, not a hesitation, I fire my rifle. The first shot hits her squarely in the back as she rolls, but as she slumps down, tries to aim up the handgun, to face me and fire, I fire again, and the second shot doesn't miss. Final shot, into her head, and she smacks back heavily before slumping over.

Any sickness I felt before is nothing compared to that which I feel now. I struggle not to vomit. All I can feel now is shame. I have defended myself before, but this was a woman I had feelings for, and thought I could trust. I refuse to accept that the world is left only full of hate and liars.

Again I stand in silence, and if someone came out and shot me now, I don't think I would stop them. Nobody does though. I forever appear to be surrounded by death.

Whatever the outcome, I am still a survivor, and even if no one else shares my ideals, I will hold onto mine. I look around, try to avoid contact with the body nearby. I must take the guns, and any ammo she had left. Whatever drove her to do this, some kind of insanity, perhaps only now I can forgive her.

A bag, over in the corner. I move around her, and see, she has a small bedroll, and a bag, no not just one, two, three, wow, as I look around there are lots of bags, boxes, drawers in chests, all sorts. I lift a lid on a box and see tins of food, another has ammo in it, lots of it.

One of the bags has clothes in it, another has more tins of food, including what we bought.

The last bag, can it be... it is! The caps, looks like all of them, and perhaps more. It is everything she stole of ours, and I think more from others. I wonder if she has been doing this a while, her way to survive, use others to help gather, and fight. She might have even led me here knowing those savage brutes were in here.

I guess I'll never know.

I don't want anyone else to find this, but I won't stay here with her.. dead.

I pick up the bag of caps, another with a handle I can sling over my shoulder and as much ammo as I can carry. I shall go back to the settlement, and stash my things there. No one will steal from there, but even so, I shall need to devise some way to protect my gear.. a better, more fortified home, and now I can afford it!

I will return here, well armed, and keep coming until I have taken everything of use.

Maybe, maybe also, I will bury Judy, and say something decent for her. We'll see...

30) A Shock to My System

I'm not that brave that I could stand around looking to see where the bullets are coming from. I dive quickly to the floor, struggling to hide behind the large wooden counter.

I lay a moment, listening. Thankfully I have some kind of defence, with these precious few bullets. I swing my rifle from across my back, and pull back on the hammer, ready to fire. I guess whoever it is, must suspect I have some kind of weapon, otherwise they would have just walked up to me and fired away.

Thankfully the light outside is bright and clear, no unwanted shadows to hide people, or worse, hide things in.

Beside two of the fridges in here, there is a doorway leading out to the rear of the place. It's a good job, because it seems the walls of this place are made of metal, and I would be forced to go out into the line of fire.

I crawl slowly, edging my way along the hidden side of the counter. The floor is dirty as hell, covered in glass and dead bugs, all sorts of garbage. I can't complaint too much, because at least I'm alive.

I get a little too close to the edge of the counter and more bullets fire, this time at random, I can tell they're not so focused on me as a target, because they're scatter firing all over.

I manage to pull myself through the gap in the doorway, and out back. Whoever it is doesn't seem to know I have moved out of sight, because they are still shooting at the counter and into the front windows.

I hadn't seen this place properly until now, but there are boxes, and what looks like it was once a sort of flat bed, bedding, a slim pillow. No need to wonder who the inhabitant might have been, because their skeleton is still laying on the bed. I guess I won't be joining them!

I wait a few seconds, listening to myself breathing heavily. I guess I must have panicked when the shots began, but I can forgive myself, can't help the fight or flight response, and it probably saved my life.

At the other side of this long thin cupboard room, there are no windows or doors out, but there is a vent at the end. I can see daylight streaming through, so it may be an exit.

Whoever is out there keeps firing, and it seems from the same spot. They must have a lot of ammunition.

I move over to the vent, leave my feet facing it, and every time a fire sounds, I kick at it, trying to mask the sounds with gunfire.

At last it gives, bending at first, then dropping out, leaving a gap large enough for me to get out. I crawl through, moving low and keeping as quiet as I can.

An explosion, I can see smoke pouring up from out front of the diner. Maybe they're trying to burn me out?

I am hidden in some bushes, and can see up to where I think the shots are coming from. I see white light ignite from the barrel of a gun, up around three stories high, in the building opposite the road from here. If I go out here I will be a fine target, must move.

I slink away, slowly, then go the the back of the high rise on this side. There is a narrow passageway before the fence, I walk along, hunched over, just in case. I get to the end of the town and circle back.

I peer around the corner of the building on my side, feeling the tension rising now. The shots have ceased. I wonder if they either realized I am no longer there, or run out of bullets. I hope it is the latter.

I can't remain like this, and need to know who it is. I run quickly across the scorched tarmac, gun up, and into the building where the shooter was. No time to wait, I look up, and begin to run up the stairs, trying not to make too much noise. It's hard, there is rubbish everywhere, an old pram, clothes strewn all over, furniture thrown down, all sorts.

I don't have to worry about noise, as whoever is up there makes a huge crashing sound, with a massive thud to the floor above.

I am close now, sprinting up, gun ready, finger on the trigger. In my mind I am ready to move, see and fire, all in a fast deadly motion.

I jump onto the landing hallway, see the doorway ahead and move on through, no hesitation. There, at the end of the short hall, a figure laying, moving around. They're stuck in all the rubbish, fallen over among the debris.

I move fast to them, point my gun, ready to shoot; to kill if necessary!

The person becomes aware of my presence, tries to lift their rifle from underneath themselves, but it is trapped. Any second, I will fire, to the head. They're gonna die.

The prone person, trapped by their own haste, I almost laugh at them. Them my jaw drops open, my eyes wild in shock, as I look and realize I am confronted by...

Judy!

29) Washing Away My Sorrows In The Rain.

Another terrible night. I felt like I was suffocating, and it was bitterly cold. I won't survive much longer like this. I had the blanket that Judy so kindly left me, but it is small and thin, and barely covers me.

I am eating breakfast, it appears to be some kind of rice, but has no taste, and the water though I think is pure tastes old and musty. I guess you get what you pay for, still!

Today, I will set out back to the old town, and will begin my search for new items to trade and use. The way I see it, I have nothing to lose now, and so if it costs me my life, if that happens while trying to improve things, then so be it.

'Don't look like you have much going for ya.' Someone says, making me jump. It is the old woman who met me at the door before. She is standing in the doorway of my shack, looking at me. I must appear to be a mess, straggly hair, unshaven, not clean, and clearly starving.

I look up at her, and I think my eyes say it all.

'I've seen it afore, new people come here, struggle to cope, and it gets the better of them. Sooner or later they die, one way or another.'

I look on despondently. 'The woman I became friends with, she took all of my stash, caps, food, water, guns, everything. I'm back to square one.' I explained, realising my predicament for the first time.

The woman rubs her chin, smiles briefly. 'Yeah, that gal, she was a difficult one. Not long here, a bit troubled. Sad to say, those like her, victims of the slave trade, they go through it and are never the same again. Never trust anyone, and it's no surprise she skipped out, they just take and run and hide.'

Her words confirmed what I already knew, but didn't help me much.

'I guess I'm going to have to try again, and see if my luck is any better. Alone this time.' I say, looking now firmly at her.

'You go out and live, or you lay down and die. People will either cross you or help you, but outside of family you never really know people, never forget that.'

Her words were kind, because she took the time to come and speak to me.I admired her for that. She wasn't offering me any kind of charity, just a nod that it affected us all, this kind of world.

'Folks round here don't have much, but if you're truly desperate, they will help.'

I nod to her. I appreciate what she is saying, and regardless of what Judy has done, it reaffirms my feeling that this really is my home.

I smile, and she turns and walks away.

I think I do have something to lose now, and so I shall be careful. I grab my gun, the little ammo I have, and the axe. Off I go to see if I can find something worthwhile, something that will lift my spirits, if not change my life.

*

This is the first time it has rained since I came out of the vault. It kind of stings my skin a little, as I walk down this rubble path towards the town again. I am soaked, head to toe, but I don't mind, because it has warmed up a little. The guards cautioned me not to drink water from the rain, still contaminated. Sometimes I think we live in a contaminated world!

Up ahead I can see the first buildings. I keep thinking any moment I am going to see Judy, stood there, waiting for me. At the back of my mind I think over and over again that if something bad happens to me, she will come running and grab my arm, and help me. Experience tells me that will not happen.

The skies are murky grey, filled with a blanket of rain, and it is hard to see ahead. Rivers of water wash away down the hills, it is raining so intensely, I wonder if perhaps I will see Noah in his Ark float past!

The dark red brick of the high buildings has changed with the rain, much darker now, and steam seems to be pouring off them, as if the water is hitting hot rock. Sometimes it's hard to accept I am still on planet Earth.

I decide to leave out the first building, the one I went into with her... Maybe go back to that one day. Next up appears to have been some kind of diner. I doubt I will be served any hot food there today, but I might find something useful. It is a long oblong shaped place, single story, with rows of tables and chairs, and a counter along one side. The windows I am looking through are all long since gone, and some of the metalwork has rusted, but generally it appears intact. Maybe I can open a business?!

All the while, here, I keep a cautious lookout for any of those huge creatures that attacked us before. I hope there are none left, but I suspect the world is full of them

I go through what was once a doorway, and walk across the ravaged tile floorway. There is an old fridge here, a metal one. I open it, and a truly foul stench pours out, horrible. There are packages of what may have once been food, but has now descended into some kind of gloup. Several tins are in there though, old I guess, but not opened. I grab a few of those, and place them on the counter. I realize, she also took that little backpack I had, need a new one, something.

She really did take it all, let me with hardly a thing.

Something pings off a wall near me, and I look around to see what it is. Again, another pinging sound, and this time a piece of wall flakes off. A thought flares up in my mind, they are bullets, pinging off the walls, aimed at me!

Someone is shooting at me...

David Cowdall - Official Author Website

28) Regrets and Hopes.

I never thought I would feel so full again. I could have eaten more, but Judy insisted I didn't. Not because we might run out, but because eating so much after being so hungry could make us sick.

I still find it hard to believe people trade with bottle caps. I guess they need something to act as a middle man. The best thing is food and water are pretty cheap, a few caps gets quite a lot to show for it.

We picked up two large bags of caps from our raid, five hundred and sixty caps. We were laughing at how much we had, and that we were rich.

Last night was good. I nice warm fire, decent food, water and even the weather at night was pleasant. I fell asleep next to Judy, and it felt good. It wasn't so good that when I woke up she was gone, but I understand; she's been through a lot, and it's affected her deeply. At least she had the kindness to put a blanket over me, but I think it was her only one, and that meant she did without. I will make amends today.

Once again as I step out the camp is a hive of activity. White smoke pours out of various shacks, and people mill around. The smell of food is rich and varied, and reminds me of what is to come for us this morning.

Almost drooling with anticipation, I go walk around to Judy's shack. I reckon we should go buy some new food supplies, a top up for the water, and then work out what we're going to invest in for more success.

Since I awoke into this strange land, I have had some shocks and surprises, enough to last me a lifetime. What confronts me now, shocks me more than anything I have ever felt before. Judy's shack is empty. No bags, no supplies, and of course not even her.

I wonder for a moment if she might have gone to get us some food in advance, but if so why has she taken all the bags? All that is left here is the saw and the axe that we used. The guns are gone, except mine, which I noticed in my shack when coming out but the majority of the ammo is not here, and neither is any of the food, or... the caps! Gone.

I can only think the best of her, because it is all I have seen. I immediately run out, make my way around the camp.

'Judy!' I call, wondering frantically that something bad might have happened to her.

I approach the main gate, see two guards standing. One of them is from last night, the sarcastic one. 'Have you seen the woman I was with? I ask.

They both laugh at me. 'Yeah, Judy.' One of them says, looking at me slyly.

'Yes!' I say quickly. 'Where is she, is she alright, has something bad happened to her?'

As I ask this, the two of them both laugh in unison. 'Oh, no.' Says the sly one. 'Quite the opposite.' The other one says. He appears mean, stubbly face, good with a gun, not the kind to argue with.

'Stop fooling around, just tell me.' I demand, knowing I am pushing my luck.

'She took her things and left, just as dawn was coming up.' The mean one explains.

'Left?' I ask incredulously. 'She took all of our stuff, and all our caps.' I say.

They both look at me, serious now.

'Stolen you say?' The mean one asks.

'Theft eh?' The other chimes in.

I nod. She has gone, surely not to the town, but just gone. I cannot believe someone who appeared so happy around me, could just up and leave, and worst of all, take everything. She could have just take half, I mean...

'She's banned from the camp if this is true. If she returns she will be shot on sight.' The mean one insists. It doesn't help me much. Once again I am back to square one. Worse, I wonder if I can ever trust anyone again.

I am a survivor. I simply accept what has happened and move on.

I walk to my shack, pick up the axe, sling the rifle over my shoulder, and note that I have around forty rounds of ammo for it. At least she left me those.

My head is swirling with it all, the loss of what we had achieved. If I ever meet her again, I don't know if I will shoot her or talk to her. I accept I may never know, and just put it to the back of my mind.

For now, I need water, and to get water I need to chop wood. So once again, only this time alone, off I go.

As I walk out, a small child stands near to one of the other places with people in, she is holding what appears to be a metal cup, filled with purified water, drinking from it occasionally.

'Hi.' She says as I walk past. My mind is like thunder, and I give her a dirty look, before walking on.

On I go to cut wood again.

*

It has been a long, horrible day. All the time I argued within myself, recriminations against Judy, for stealing it all, and against myself for being so stupid. I slogged away and cut wood and dragged it into camp, traded it for little drink and bits of food. then repeated it. I doubt I have ever worked so hard. I feel shattered, but I have enough food to last me at least a couple of weeks if I ration it, and enough water to survive even longer.

I shall sleep tonight, if my mind allows it, and first thing tomorrow I will go back to that town, and do so every day until I have enough caps, water, food, guns and ammo that no one will ever think to steal from me again.

Someone or something is going to regret crossing me, that much is for sure...

27) Barter Time.

With the sun at the back of these two brutes, it seems as if they are as tall as the buildings around them. They just stand there looking at us, but I can see drool glistening from their mouths. They really do see us as food. They wear similar kind of clothes, large tattered trousers, and huge hobnail boots. Their torsos are wrapped in leather harnesses and bullet bandoleers. One has a club strapped to its back, a scruffy looking thing with nails sticking out. The other just holds onto what appears to be a weak hand made gun.

Their looks are ferocious, and I wonder if finally we have met our match.

'I'm huuuuungry!' One of them shouts, his piercing red eyes lighting up at the sound of it.

Before I can react, even think to do anything, bullets fly past in a hail, skipping and skittering across the road ahead and around us. I instinctively drop to the ground, covering my head with my hands, for all the good it will do.

I try to see what is going on, but the loud clattering of the firing makes it hard not to wince. Through flinching eyes I see bullets spatter and rip into the two two brutes, one after the other, shredding into them aggressively, tearing away any chance they may have of returning the attack.

It seems like an age, where all I can hear is hellfire and death. I feel so useless, unable to bring myself to join in the battle, but before I can even think of doing anything, it is over. The two great giant things stumble and fall, collapsing to the ground. It all goes quiet, and finally I dare to look around. Judy is stood behind me, automatic rifle in hand, as white smoke pours out of it.

The look on her face is a stark contrast to anything I have seen from her before. She looks very different to how I had imagined her.

'Judy.' I say, as she seems lost, staring ahead, into space, her face snarling, but she remains stuck, as if in a time warp.

'Judy!' I shout, and finally she breaks, slowly looking my way. I wonder if she might train the focus of her gun on me, but thankfully she doesn't. I would hate to have to.. defend myself.

'I guess they weren't that tough.' She says, sneering. It shows a side to her I hadn't known, and I'm not sure I like it. I just sit there a moment, looking at her, wondering about her.

She looks at me, eyes focused now, allowing the gun to lower much more. She can see the look I am giving.

'I'm sorry, just I promised myself I wouldn't ever be a victim again.' She says.

I stand up, dusting myself down, and smile. 'I'm just glad you're on my side!' I say, and she loses the pain, expresses herself  more, and laughs, along with me.

'Come on, before any more of them turn up and you have to get all badass on them!' I say, and again we both laugh. I truly am thankful she is on my side.

*

'OK, so we got plenty of stuff for our own uses, what are we going to trade?' I ask, as we stand outside the camp. the journey back was much happier, but still hard work. Night falls as we finally return, but in the camp life and trade never stops.

'We can trade all the minor guns, keep a pistol each and the rifles. Other stuff and bullets we don't need can go.' Judy says. I nod, she is right, we wouldn't be alive if we hadn't found the rifles.

'The other stuff, might as well keep. We can use it all, and I reckon we go back every day and keep getting stuff, til we have enough to support ourselves through whatever happens.'

I like this side of Judy, she seems positive, and determined. She is a survivor, and someone I think I will grow to care deeply for.

'I like your thinking.' I say.

'I like you.' She replies.

I laugh, feeling the warmth of my blushes, even if in the dark she can't see it.

We enter through the gates, and see a hive of activity, trade, selling, buying, offers of protection, a warm body for the night, male and female.

'Arket is the best trader to sell guns to. Over there.' Judy says, pointing over to a man, half dressed, large greasy belly sticking out. He chews on what seems to be a cigar, but is in fact an ear of corn.

'We can leave the basket of tools and things just here, and take this stuff, see what he offers.' She says, and I just nod.

Arket has a large stall, with a decent shack behind himself. Neon lights buzz around, lighting and flickering. The letters are jumbled meaningless, but it offers some kind of attraction and light.

'What can I do for you sir?' The man asks, looking squarely at me. Before I can reply, inquiring politely if he might be interested in purchasing something, Judy drops the bags of guns onto the table, creating a loud thud.

'Guns, we got guns, and ammo, and we're selling.' She says, sounding anything but polite.

She opens the bag, lifts out an automatic rifle, and Arket's eyes light up.

'Not for sale, the rifles are ours, and the hand guns, and the ammo for them.' She says abruptly.

She lifts out some worn shotguns, four other small shooters, and ammo for them, slamming them hard on the counter. 'These, that's all fair price.'

'Fifty caps for the three shotguns, twenty caps for each of the other guns, and another fifty caps for the ammo.' Arket says, chewing some more on his corn.

'Ha!' Judy shouts loudly, making us all jump. She appears definitely to be in charge. 'Double that and we have a deal.' She says, sneering again.

Arket looks angry. 'Next customer please.' He shouts at no one, because we are all that there are to trade with.

'You won't get anyone else selling weapons around here, and certainly none with ammo.' She says, staring him down.

Arket looks as if he has been backed into a corner. 'Fine.' He says reluctantly, reaching under his counter.

'Sally, get the stash, and make sure security is watching, I don't trust these two.' He says, sneering back.

'The feeling is mutual.' Judy says, shoving the guns across to him.

Arket takes the guns and drops down small bags, each filled with metal bottle caps.

'That's five hundred and sixty caps, trade deal done.' Arket says, spitting on his hand. I grimace, but Judy does the same and they slap hands for a sealed deal. She grabs the caps, and holds onto the tightly, like cradling a newborn baby.

'Is that good?' I ask, never having used caps before.

'If we were buying guns, this would maybe buy two of these rifles, but all these caps, will easily buy us enough food and water and anything else for a good two months.' Judy explain. Now it is my turn for my eyes to light up.

'Now what?' I ask.

Judy smiles again. 'Let's go buy some decent food!' She says, and together we head for the food stalls. The smell of it all begins to intoxicate me...

26) Treasure and Death.

We sit for a moment, getting to grips with our emotions, and calming down.

'Do you think there are more of them?' I ask.

Judy Shrugs. 'Probably. Would explain why no one seems to come here.'

'Well, I suggest we grab what we can from here, and then get back. We get as much as we can carry, and hopefully enough to begin building a life for us both back at that camp.' I say.

Judy gives me an odd look. 'Us?' She says, enquiring.

I nod, then realize it may not be something a woman would want to hear, given what she has been through... at the hands of other men.

Before I can speak she leans over quickly and hugs me. It feels nice, to be connected to someone else, someone I feel I can trust. She looks up at me, smiling eyes, and I know she feels the same. I raise my hand and push away a scruffy lock of her hair from her face.

'Come on, as nice as this is, it won't do to get mashed by another of those great brutes.' I say, reluctantly moving gently away. She looks hurt, but knows I am right.

We both stand, but she still has a hold of my hand, as if letting go might mean I disappear. Hopefully I won't.

Now the town seems peaceful, but I know it won't last. I look over the edge of the chasm, and cannot see the bottom. It is dark, with white mist coming out from it. Whatever hit there made a real mess of the immediate surroundings, but otherwise many buildings seem intact. I walk to my right, and I can see what appears to be a main street, with small, medium and large buildings going a long way down, with side streets off.

'I reckon we split up, go first building we come to, and go in and methodically go through every nook and cranny, getting what might seem useful and drop it out into the street in a pile. Then find a way to bring it back.' I say.

Judy looks at me, she is clearly unnerved by the idea. 'There are a lot of hidden places in there, and anything could be lurking waiting for us, easy prey. I doubt I could survive.'

She squeezes my hand tighter. She looks as if she has survived more than one scrape, scars and knocks to show for it. I feel sure she could just as well as I could. No doubt she is worried I might go, and she wouldn't see me again.

'OK, we'll do it together. You can hold the axe, and if anything jumps out on us you hit it and I'll run away.'

Judy laughs. We don't need to say any more, we just go ahead and try to get it done. The first building is dark red, very tall, but all of its windows are blown out. Obviously they would be, if there was another great war, it's amazing that anything survived.

I push hard on the wooden door to the building. It is heavy, and takes some effort to move. As the door finally opens, a cloud of dust sweeps out, and it stinks. Clearly it hasn't been opened in a very long time. It appears dark, and stairs lead up to other floors. The walls have little of what was green paint, and plaster is flaking off besides.
I can hear scratching sounds, Judy must hear it too because she wields the axe, gripping it tightly and moving around ready to swing

Neither of us feel good about this, but what choice do we have?

First floor, weak half broken door, leads into what appears was an apartment. There is furniture here, if I could carry it we could use it in our shacks; a sofa, two chairs, a small table, a cabinet, all in good enough condition. Hopefully we can find some kind of cart or something to move it all.

Everything is covered in thick dust, no prints, as if it were left like it after some great attack, everyone fled, and nothing has changed since. So sad, and yet so beautiful. Like some kind of time memorial to Man.

It is a small apartment, a connected living area, to open plan kitchen. Two closed doors lead off. The kitchen has utensils, knives, forks, cups, metal plates. I begin to grab at them all, stack them on the sofa.

Judy continues to look all around, seems more scared than I am, but I won't admit it to her.

I open wall cupboard doors, and there are wasted packets of food, no longer rancid, just dried to dust. there is a large basket in one, good enough to carry things for now. I open one of the doors, it is a wall cupboard, big enough to walk in. Wonderful! I find a shovel, brushes.. tools! A saw, a hammer, nails, rope, all sorts. I just throw all of the things into the basket, quicker than I should: making noise.

Finally, we can't take the tension any longer, we need to take the stuff and go, while we still can. Once last thing, the other door. I look at Judy, and can see the concern on her face.

'Take what we have, we can come back another time.' She says quietly.

'We need something more to trade, so we can get better food, and more water.' I reply. It is the sensible thing to do, but I share the nagging doubt she expresses.

No time to waste, we don't want to be here after dark. I grab at the door handle, it comes away in my hand, but the door swings open. Light filtering through from a ragged curtain, enough to see it is a bedroom.

I step through, my senses tingling all the time. A double bed sits against a wall, covers and sagging pillows. I grab at them, thinking they can keep us warm, before Judy can say no, I pull back, exposing two corpses, long since rotted, leaving only what remains of their skeleton. I feel sick, not from what I see but what has gone on here.

I look through drawers, find an old watch, not working but maybe good for trade. There are clothes, in a half open suitcase, possibly my size, and a dress. I pick it up, hold it for Judy to see, I smile at her, picturing her in it.

She returns a look of complete disdain. 'No dresses, I won't ever wear a dress again for a man to enjoy.' She says. sounding dull, angry. the look on her face is fearsome.

I just nod and throw it aside.

Once last cupboard, then we go. I open it, and stand back in shock at what I see. How could such a peaceful place hold such things?

The entire cupboard is lined with guns, rifles, automatic, hunting, handguns, ammunition in bags. It is like Alladin's cave, chock full of goodness.

It is enough to lift both our spirits. Judy doesn't hesitate, grabbing a black automatic rifle. She picks through ammunition, draws a clip and slides it in, cocking it easily, before pointing it ahead of herself.

'I guess you're ready for action.' I say cheerfully. She smiles back broadly, handing me the gun.

'I'll stick with a couple of handguns. We'll take as much as we can carry.' Without another word she leans in, grabs a black bag and piles stuff in. 'What we can't carry, we'll come back for.' She says, sounding more and more in control.

I smile. 'I like your style!' I say. Judy gives a mischievous look back. I follow her lead and fill what we can. Together we go back out, I grab the basket and anything I can carry, laden with it, and we head back.

As we step outside, back into the fading sun, we look down the main street, a veritable trove of treasure waiting for us to plunder.

I turn back, ready to head home, only to be confronted by two more of the great brutes, standing, staring at us with lascivious red eyes.

'Humaaaaan, time for dinner, and you're it!' One screams...

25) Laughter and Tears.

No time to think, I flail, instinctively, trying to grab onto something, anything. As I round the corner My feet lose grip, because there is nothing to grip onto. The ground opens up into a massive crater, with what appears to be an unexploded bomb in the center.
I try desperately to take a hold of something, swinging like a falling cat, and bang. My left hand grips. A piece of outcropped metal, it stings, and wrenches my arm, but I can just about hold on. I find myself swinging in the breeze, with nothing else to cling to, and a drop hundreds of feet below.

I hear a crashing sound nearby, as this great monstrosity charges after me. He calls for my blood, stamping closer.

He comes crashing around the edge of the building, eyes only on me. I can see the bloodlust in his eyes, swinging that huge blade around. His mighty mouth is drooling, dripping with a thirst to eat, which involves me. As he focuses on me, his eyes light up, surprise and glee that he appears to have caught me.

Just one more, two more steps, keep looking at me...

Too late, he sees the cavernous gap below, but too late to stop himself. His huge bulk drives him over, and now he flails around like a giant bird, trying to catch onto something.

My heart leaps as this creature, knowing what is coming leaps out towards me, trying to take me down with him.

'Come on humaaaaaan, let's die together.' It shouts, like some monstrous cross between a cage fighter and a bull, all muscles and brawn.

I panic, lifting my legs away, holding onto the metal strut for dear life, pulling myself up. This great yellow hand tries to grab at me, like some fairyland giant, only it is no fantasy.

It misses, cursing as it does, before dropping away into the pit. I watch as it falls, wondering if due to its immense size it might just land easily, on its feet and then begin running back up the edge to get me.

The trickling sense of fear that washes over me is proven false, as I hear an almighty crash. It hits into metal girders down below, shattering what is left of the fallen building within the pit. The beast gives out an almighty cry, painful, but wrapped in shadows so far below I cannot see anything.

I allow myself the relief of belief that it is dead. Common sense tells me so, but still, there may be more of them, and worst of all, I am still hanging here, with no means to get back to safe ground. I had to leap like the thing did to gain a hold onto anything, and it is too far back, and higher up now to get safe. The drop below is sheer, and into darkness. I realize what small luck I do have that this thing didn't detonate the bomb below.

Could it be nuclear? If it had set that off I might have gone along with everything else around here. An entire town engulfed in flames and radiation. One thing, it does give me an indication of what might have happened to the world. Did we do it? Did we finally go to war, dropping all these bombs, wiping most of humanity out? Stupid, stupid humans.

I feel my hand losing its grip. I change over, but either hand it stings, cutting into my skin. I look around desperately, trying to see anything to help. It is too far, nothing to grab to, nothing to give me hope. Any second and I will fall.

I close my eyes, and try to remember the past. I remember a face, a young woman, but I cannot recall her name. Names elude me, even my own.

Any moment now and none of this will matter.

'Hey, stranger, here.' A voice calls, and I know the sound of it. I open my eyes, struggle to clear my vision, and I cannot believe what I see at the edge of the cliff.

Macready. That name screams out at me as I look at the woman on the edge of the abyss. She is waving her arms at me, her face pull of panic. Macready the voice rings again in my mind.

I hold into the piece of metal with both hands now, feeling the throbbing as my grips diminishes. My eyes clear, and I see something crazy, Judy is standing there. She has followed me, tears in her eyes. I wonder if she thinks I might have just done this for some fun.

'Hold on, I'll get something.' She shouts, turning to run away.

I can't help but see the humour in it, she says that, turns away and when she gets back sees I'm gone and wonders if she is hallucinating.

I wait, as best I can, I have no choice.

Miracle! It's not rope, but a length of cable. She beckons to me to grab it. Hold on I think, I will just grab it as I fall away into nothing. I release one hands, she swings it out, stronger than I thought. It hits me on the chest, dropping down.

I grab it! Fine, but what next?

'It's tied the other end, just hold it tight and let go.' She shouts. I know what she means, but I know she hasn't thought it through.

I wrap the cable around my hand and arm as best I can, and look at her, eye to eye as I let go. She screams as I drop like a stone. I fall, but the cable drags me to the abyss wall, and I know what is coming.

I crash into the bare rock with a thud almost knocking myself out. I feel dazed and sick, it is all I can do to just hang on.

Moving up, slowly, I feel myself being pulled up, inches at a time. I hear her struggling, doing her best for me, crying.

I shake myself out of this lethargy. I pull with one hand on the rock besides me, lifting and helping as I can. Finally, with one last surge of effort, I spill over, back onto the tarmac, panting and breathing raucously.

I lay there looking up at the blazing blue sky, and then her face leaning over me. I don't know whether to laugh or cry, but she does enough crying for us both.

Finally I sit up a little, and look at her pale skin. Her deep hazel eyes, and her ragged but beautiful hair.

'Hi, my name is Macready.' I say, and she stops crying, breaking out into a joyful smile, full of laughter...

24) A Huge Yellow Brute Attacks.

As much as I feel more secure, that I have a safe base to come back to, and that I have someone at last that I feel I can trust, I cannot escape the deep sense of fear that envelopes me.
I had a restless nights sleep, tossing and turning. It doesn't help that this bed is so poor. It is strong, wooden, but no softness to it. I look around what there is of my little shack, and I can see sunlight poking through holes in the roof. The walls are sturdy now, but other than that, there is nothing in here. No place to sit, the floor is just mud, and I don't even have anything to cook with.

What I would give to be able to trade for some of those fresh wooden planks they are making over there. Some here have them, bigger places, proper flooring, proper homes.

I cannot rest, and though it is early, I must get on. I take a hold of the axe, because I know I will need it. I sling my backpack over my shoulder. I notice how bad I smell, I have to wash somehow. I need new clothes too, to get out of these rags.

As I step outside, I notice how chill the air is. I have no idea what the seasons here might bring, but I am certain if there is anything approaching it being a winter, I will not survive. I doubt many will. I look quickly in to see if Judy is awake, she isn't. She looks cold, as much as I felt. Clearly we have to do something, but given where I intend to go, I just leave her to sleep.

The white haze from the day before has lifted, and the air feels a bit fresher, as much as it can be in this terrible place. I wonder if the entire planet has become such a tomb.

The camp is beginning to wake up, with the smell of fires starting up, and dare I say it, food being cooked. I wonder about drinking some of the purified water we have, but I will leave it. We need it to last, and I can quench my thirst when I get back; if I survive that is.

As always my legs and arms feel weary, my joints ache. Once I get going I'll improve. I begin my slow walk, to the gate, and a bleary eyed guard lets me through. I know what to expect out here, back into the Wasteland, but no matter what I have seen, I know nothing can truly prepare you for what happens.

To my left, there is the river, and woodland, where we go to cut wood. There are two men and another woman already heading there. Some it seems just do that, endlessly, accepting their limitations, but I can't do just that, it's not in my instincts to be that way.

I turn to the guard and catch his attention. 'Hey, what kind of things should I search out for trade, what makes the best trades for goods in here?' I ask.

He looks as me, finishes yawning again and coughs, scratching his groin. 'Caps, oh and weapons, of any kind. They always trade well.' He replies.

I look back at him, confused. 'Caps, what do you mean caps?'

'Bottle caps, you know, off old Nuka Cola bottles. They had some precious metals in the caps, to stop them losing their special flavour. So now they're the only currency, cos they have something valuable in them.' He says, and turns away to urinate against the wooden fence.
His conduct doesn't instill much confidence in me over his ability to guard, but there are plenty of them, and most importantly the automatic rifles slung over their backs certainly look deadly enough.

'Where's the best place to go looking for caps and weapons then?'

'There's a few towns around here, all of them dead, except for the Raiders, and the Ghouls.'

'I know the Raiders, had a few run ins with them, but what are Ghouls?'

'Burnt like a crisp, and angry as hell. Now if you don't mind, I'm busy.' The guard says, as he begins to pick his nose.

I know what he means, Ghouls, burnt people, wasted. It sends a shiver down my spine, reminding me of my lucky escape.

I head out, searching for a town. The ground is rough travelling, gravelly and full of rocks. It seems like something out of a desert, and to back that up there are even cacti here and there. The sun has risen high in the deep blue sky, and I can feel it bearing down on me. It's going to be a long day.

As I walk along, I think about thirty minutes I must have been heading out now, it just seemed like it was going to be an endless series of hills and valleys, a never ending dead end. It's a wonder anything survives out here, but I guess humans are like cockroaches, cut off our heads and we still thrive.

Then, shimmering in the heat way out, I think I see what might be a building. As I walk closer, I am right, it is one, then another, and more. The beginnings of a town, perhaps more.

A lot of the buildings are half destroyed, doorways collapsed, roofs gone, but funnily enough, the road seems perfectly intact. As I enter the place, the gravel and rocks underfoot change to tarmac, shiny and smooth. There are even cars here dotted around. I wonder if there is any source of fuel, diesel or petrol. Imagine how far I might travel if I could get one of these things working.

There are side streets off, and a long main street, and I can see some buildings still seem intact. I have high hopes that I might succeed in finding some useful gear here. Though, I cannot understand why this town hasn't already been picked clean.

Before I can finish my thought, a glint in the sun catches my attention, and my mind screams to move, as a silver blade comes crashing down upon me. Instinctively I dodge away, dropping sideways, and foolishly falling to the ground. At first the sun blinds me, and I cannot see what it is, but as I try to scurry back, pulling away from further attacks, I finally see what is upon me.

The thing standing over me must be all of eight feet tall, and so muscular that it would win a thousand body building contests. It has a large hammer, which is almost as big as I am. Even its boots are four times the size of what I might wear. Its skin seems like leather, and gives off a raidiant yellow hue in the sun. My puny little axe will struggle to make an impact against this thing.

Brave or foolish, I spin around on the ground, clutching at the tarmac, feeling the stinging heat against my fingers, and leap up to sprint away. The brute may be huge, and fearsome strong, but it's also slow. Or so I had hoped, as it too turns and begins to lunge towards me.

As I run, I feel my heart beating insanely in my chest, and the thought occurs to me: now I know why the town remains so clear of others.

I can hear a giant's footsteps beating down on me, as it calls out.

'Humaaaaaan, come back, I am hungry for your bones!' It thunders.

It feels like I am stuck in some morbid nursery rhyme, and I am being chased by an illusion. I run around a corner, and my world falls away...