23) The Dread of the Future.

We should have checked the food before we walked away. To suggest it was enough for two people for three days is a joke. Yes, it might do so if we just nibble occasionally at it.
There were three ears of corn, small, and nothing to go with the, so tough and dry. There is some kind of meat, which was tough, foul tasting and covered in thick salt. I guess it's designed to ensure it doesn't go off too quickly, and has been heavily cured, but it needs plenty of water to wash it down, and that is the hard part.We have quite a bit now, probably enough to drink to last more than a few days. but when swilling it back to counter the awful food, it goes quickly.
Lastly, a large loaf of bread, but it is solid as a rock. No mold that I can tell, so it will have to do. The combination has created a small meal for this turn's ration, enough to sustain is for now, but it tastes horrible.

Clouds passing over have left the entire place looking washed out, as if a white blanket has been placed upon us, to stem our growth. It affects everything we do, because the temperature has lowered, and so the hive of activity that there was. That won't stop us, it can't, we have no choice.

'Once we finish this feast, we can trek out once again and go get more wood. This time, what we gather we bring back here and try rebuild our houses. Enough to withstand any kind of seriously bad weather.' I suggest. Judy nods, unable to speak due to nibbling on a particularly tough piece of meat.

'Shame we can't use their machine to mill some of the wood into planks, that would make for a very serious and stable home.' I continue.

Judy swallows finally. 'Yeah, you can, but like everything else in here, it comes with a price.'

I can see everything here does have a price, and everything is for sale. The only free thing is the land and our house, but that is free so that more people choose to come and live here, so there are more to trade with, and those with the most make a lot of money from it.

We both get up together, and prepare to work again. We were sat in what is supposed to be Judy's house, not so much a house as a shack, and barely even that. She has done the best with it that she could, some straw on her bed, cleaned out the rubbish and cleared the hard mud flooring, but the roof is virtually none existent, and the walls are filled with gaps. The moment it rains, everything will become boggy and wet.

We can't think about that for now, other than to do better. Once again we both head out of the gate, past the guards. We can never see their faces, always hidden by cloth across or a leather mask, but from what I can see, combined with their fearsome looking weapons they wouldn't be ones I would choose to argue with.

I dread the thought of another day of endless hacking away, sipping carefully at the water, and dragging it all through, but the end product will hopefully prove worthwhile. I hope Judy does better, but I know her cutting is poor.

'How about I cut down some of these trees, the most manageable ones, and then as I cut pieces off, you drag them to our homes?' I suggest. Judy I can tell is feeling the same as I, the hard work just at the beginning, it's going to be tough. She nods quietly, and stands back as I swing away.

*

It's surprising what a bit of food and decent water can do for you. I attacked the wood like a savage, hacking away at it and felled trees in no time. I will have to find a way to sharpen my axe, but thankfully the trees aren't too big and so go down easily.

Judy looks exhausted, walking back and forth, carrying all the heavy pieces. I respect her, she never complained, and just got on with it.

A few times going into the camp we were approached by others, begging for help. I guess begging isn't forbidden, but no one seems to offer help for anything here, and we have enough to do looking after our own.

In all there are around sixty pieces of timber, and another twenty smaller pieces. More than enough to shore up the houses.

I finally pull out the saw blade. It is long with jagged teeth, but no handle. I wrap a piece of cloth around it for now, to make holding it easier, but in time I will have to find a knife, or trade for one, and carve something a bit more fitting. We really need more tools, but getting something to trade for them is going to be either difficult, or dangerous.

I get to work, cutting notches into the timber, then cutting the smaller pieces into narrow joins, slices even that will hold it together. It's not as good as nails and a hammer, or even rope to bind it, but it will do, as long as we leave some of the heavier pieces at the bottom for leverage.

Judy looks at me, watching me work.

'Where did you learn to do that?' She finally asks.

I shake my head. 'I'm not entirely certain, another of those things I don't properly remember. I seem to know enough to do things, but have no memory of how I came to know such things.'

'Most people have no skills, and little knowledge of anything, other than surviving.' Judy says. It seems sad, how things have become. I wonder if mankind is dying.

Bit by bit I drag pieces of heavy wood around our shacks, and fasten bridges between them, across as a plinth, to hold it sturdily in place. It takes time, but isn't too much hard work, and before long it takes shape. It is only a simply wood surround, but enough, and with a fixed roof will withstand most things.

I stop for a moment. 'OK, now get some river water, in anything you can find to carry it, make some of this mud into a kind of clay, and line the holes within the wood with it, to keep out the wind and rain from outside.' I say. Judy springs to attention over it. I think she is so in awe of what I have done here, she is excited to help out.

While she works at it, I continue and do the same to my home, using the last of the wood to surround my place. Before long they both look much sturdier, and though I say so myself, I actually think they look better than most of those near us.

Judy works away at it, on both places, slopping around and using the softened mud to fill gaps. As light begins to fade, it is done. The roof needs a cover, and the floor inside will need attention on them both, but for now it feels much safe, and quieter. The protection from the chill night air is good.

Judy doesn't say anything, but I can see the emotion in her eyes. She just leaps at me and hugs me. It feels nice, the envelope of arms around me, cared for and respected. I hug her back, feeling something much greater than fear for the first time.

We are both clearly shattered. I cannot help but imagine that she might come and share my bed with me tonight, but it is obvious after all the things she must have been through, it is the last thing she wants or needs.

'We need something to cover the roof, and better tools. We need to find a way to get some.' I say.

'No one in camp other than the wood merchants will have such things. There are other sellers, some selling high quality goods, but they expect a lot in trade.' Judy says.

'I guess I am going to have to go wandering outside tomorrow.' I say. Judy looks horrified.

'No, don't.' She says harshly. She is clearly rattled by the thought of me going. Her eyes are wide, and suddenly she is trembling.

'It's OK, I won't go far, or for long.' I say, trying to reassure her.

'I can trade, I can sell myself to them, they will pay for that.' She says, and now it is my turn to look horrified. She returns a look of shame.

'No, I didn't mean it like that. I mean, you're too good for that, we won't do that, ever.' I say, and again she gives me that look, as if she has never heard a man say such things to her.

Again she hugs me, tighter than ever, but I welcome it.

'Sleep, then tomorrow I shall take the axe for defense, and go have a wander.' I say.

'OK.' Judy says reluctantly.

I go to my bed, preparing to lay and sleep as the last light fades. I look around and see her stood by the door. She looks at me, and to my bed, and I know, she feels obligated.

'It's OK, you go get some rest. I'll see you in the morning early, and get started.'

Judy smiles at me, that pleasant positive smile of hers. 'See you in the morning.' She says, and is gone before I can answer.

The last moment of waking, I think of the day ahead, and what is to come. Once again that deep sense of dread returns...